CeritaNyo

Ya, sudah lama. Sudah lama sejak getar itu hadir. Entah akan berakhir dengan manis atau getir. Sudah lama. Sejak terakhir bibirnya terbuka selebar itu. Sejak terakhir hatinya sepenuh itu. Sejak terakhir dirinya diperlakukan sebaik itu. Ah, aku tak bisa lagi menahan rindu, bisa kah kau langsung menghubungiku? kosong dua satu ...-

Birthday should be one of the special day in a year. Not because of the present you will get, but for me, it's because of the prayer. Birthday is beautiful because of the people who celebrate your birthday come with all those good wishes. Have a long life, be happy, have a joyful birthday. Simple words, but i love it the most. Some people also add on extra beautiful words. Thank you for being born. Thank you for holdin on til now. Or even thank you for being my friend. Thank you for spending your life with me. I can't hold back my tears when i read all those words in my birthday greeting chats or letters. I'm so thankful. Receiving presents and foods on my birthday is indeed make me happy. But, a simple "happy birthday" is really enough. I'm so thankful even with that simple phrase. Birthday is not about gettin all those presents. It's also not about partying all night long in a 5 star hotel. It's about sincere prayer your families, your friends, or ev...

What's life really? She asks that question several times in front of the mirror. We have to be rich. We have to be happy. We must have a job. We have to get a degree. We have to do this. We have to do that. But who's the one who said that? Who's the one who sets the standard to live? What's life really? Some people do it easily. Some people sacrifice many things just to live. Some people said it's nice to live a life. Some people don't want it. What's life really? She asks that question again and again. No one answer. But, she knows one thing, she doesn't want it.

Yap. Basically, we are alone. Most of us were born alone. At least, i was born alone. That's why i often feel like i spent most of my time alone. It's some kind of healing for me. I don't hate people, but sometimes, interacting with others drained my energy more than doing my assignments did. I don't hate people, but still, please let me be in my little bubble, where i feel the most comfortable. Before this covid things, i already love to stay in my room, scrolling down the timeline, reading a lot of books, or laying on my bed. Sometimes, i love to go out and hang out with my friends and family. After this covid happens, it got worse. Interacting with other people really make me tired. I might be go out for a day, chitchat with my friend for a day, but after that, i would definitely stay in my little bubble for a month to recharge my energy. I hate it when someone force me to visit someone house or to interact with other people. If i don't want to, then whyyy?! And ...

Saat kita suka sesuatu atau seseorang sedikit lebih banyak, kita kadang ngerasain kind of sparks of joy di dalam hati, kan? Tapi, sayangnya, kadang-kadang perasaan itu redup, atau bahkan ilang gitu aja. Terus, kalo udah kayak gitu, efeknya jadi males ngejalanin apa yang dulu kita suka, jadi enggak yakin sama diri sendiri, atau mau berenti aja. Dulu, gue enggak tau gimana cara ngembaliinnya. Tapi, sekarang gue tau. Gue enggak tau sih cara ini bakal berhasil buat orang lain juga atau enggak, but at least it works for me . Sparks yang pernah gue rasain selalu balik saat gue ketemu sama orang-orang sebidang yang inspiratif dan passionate abis. Passion mereka tuh kayak sampe dan nyentil gue. Dalam kasus gue, mereka-mereka ini kebanyakan senior, umurnya udah seumuran sama ibu bapak gue, bahkan ada yang lebih tua dari nenek gue. Tapi, mereka masih semangat banget. Gue malu. Cara pikir dan semangatnya mereka tuh selalu nular ke gue. Makanya, setiap kali ada kesempatan buat ketemu dalam seminar...

I read a very good sentence written on a sticker, "if you want to be happy, you have to wake up with the intention to be happy". So i did. It's been a week since i started that thing. I really hope it can be my new habit because it helps me a lot. If i wake up with positive mind, i can finish the day easily without too much worry. You can try by yourself if you want to feel that too. After doing what the sticker says, i can process everything one by one. I can--slowly--reduce my overthinking habit. I feel a little bit happier. That's ok. Everything start from a little bit anyway. I've been doing good now, fortunately. I will keep doing good for myself and other people around me. I don't want them to keep reading and listening my complaints over and over again. It's nice to spread positivity, right? Then, i also trying to feel enough of myself. I'm trying to stop being greedy in life. I will do whatever it is one by one. I know everyone is struggling in...